Me and my now-wife have been together for a long time and for a good chunk of those, she’s been an active blogger. More recently she’s become more of an influencer, as her following has grown on social media and people actually act on her recommendations. It’s amazing and it’s brought about some of the most amazing opportunities as a result.
However, it really does put a lot of pressure on me. I’m not good at photography, I don’t care about the topics that influencer types tend to hype up about, and I don’t know how I’m supposed to keep up.
My wife is really on to me about posting because she sees that I enjoy the writing side (with this blog) but gets so frustrated that I don’t carry it through to Instagram – where she constantly tells me the money is.
Really and truly, every time I try to write a caption, it takes me over an hour. It will be the simplest thing in the end, but all I think about is who is going to see it, what they’re going to think and if I come across as different to the person they think I am.
It’s especially hard for me because when I left for London all those years back, I was seen as a particular person to a lot of friends and family. I feel like I changed loads but I haven’t been able to meet up with those people again to show them. Somehow loads of those kinds of people follow me now and these expectations paralyse me with stage fright/writer’s block every time I need to do something as trivial as an Instagram caption.
As I write this I can tell that this is all ridiculous and something I really need to get over if I’m going to get to where my wife wants to be as an influencer, but it’s like it feels like I’ve got so many conflicting things going around in my head. Who I am on here is my real sel. Who I want to be on Instagram is my real self, but without THIS much personal info.
Who I’m being asked to be on Instagram is an exaggeration of me. To those who used to know me (but still follow me) presenting an exaggerated version of me is just going to make me look stupid, and it’s especially annoying because I’m probably never going to see them again to be able to show them that I’m different.
I don’t know what I’m trying to say here, but basically there’s a lot of pressure for me to be an influencer’s husband that is being thrust into this world too.
